We are experiencing some movement in the opposite direction this week. First of all, R had a follow up swim lesson yesterday. As a precursor to the next statement, we have not been able to practice our skillz much because the pools are all freaking freezing all of a sudden. Mid-May, boom! Pool is a lovely bath-like temp. Mid-September, boom again! Too cold to dip your toes in. Anyway, so we went to the lesson, and R was clearly struggling and Gwen told me that she had regressed dramatically.
Today, I dropped R off for Zoo Day at preschool, a special day when the exotic animal guy brings lots of creatures up to the school and does a presentation for the kids. Awesome, yes? Reese was so excited last night that she was saying she wanted to go to school. No dice this a.m. She whined and worried all morning before we left, then went into a full-on panic attack when we got to the room, crying, clinging to my leg, saying "I want my mommmmy!" So I left her in a state of toddler meltdown in the arms of Ms. Tori. And proceeded to worry all morning long. I had an appointment, then hit the trail to process some of the stuff going on, including the morning's drop-off. Instead of skipping this time, I had the cloud of gloom and doom hanging over my head, following me along as I stomped around the loop.
(In spite of all this to think about, I got so nostalgic seeing all the ACL stuff going up. I am super excited to head to FL and see David and hang out at the beach...but, it's also the first time I will miss the festival completely. I am sad to see all the familiar sites go up and know I will miss them. I am sad David isn't working it this year and we can't fly around on the golf carts. I am sad I won't be in attendance at Base Camp. I sadly will not enjoy a chicken cone, and the list goes on. I hope some of you will give me great updates about ACL this year. Honestly, if you had told me a few years ago that I would not be attending ACL, I would have been in a state of disbelief. I might have smacked you for saying something so outrageous! "Me, miss ACL fest?? Never!" But if I have learned anything this year, it is to expect the unexpected and be prepared for change, sometimes in a major way. So thank you for THAT, 2008.) Where was I? Oh, yes....
I braced myself for pick-up, which went pretty much as expected. Although R was not in mid-wail when I arrived, she was standing by the door, with her backpack on and ready to go. The rest of the kiddos were still sitting, calmly eating lunch. Not Reese, she was ready to get the heck outta dodge. Ms. Tori did not sugarcoat today, saying, "It's been a pretty rough day." While R did apparently enjoy the zoo component of the day (telling me about a snake and a kangaroo), the rest of the time she was pretty miserable. The teachers had to hold her a lot and as soon as she started to relax and maybe even enjoy something, she would catch herself, cry and start saying she wanted me. Regression, strike 2.
I don't know, I'm pretty much at a loss. It seemed like we were making progress last week, but then this week hits like a ton of bricks. On the one hand, I really don't want to traumatize her. I want her to equate school with happy times and positive thoughts. The teachers agreed with this and even made the statement that she is pretty young. They also sort of looked at me blankly when I said we'd try it again on Thursday. I guess I don't know when to call it and decide we'll just try again next year. Or when to push on and see if it just takes more time for her to adapt. Because honestly, even though it's only been a few weeks, I have REALLY gotten used to having these 7 hours a week to myself. Sure, I am busy the whole time and fret quite a bit about what is happening with R, but having the chunk of time just for myself feels like a shot of pure oxygen. Decisions, decisions....gaaaaah. What to do?
Also, regression, strike 3: R has been sleeping so well lately--naps and at night--going right down, staying asleep for loooong periods of time, no complaints. You know where this is going: yesterday, she fought me for an hour before finally relinquishing to the nap. Last night, she woke up at 4 am screaming to come to my bed (I rocked her and got her down again in her crib). She went right down for her nap today, so maybe it was a fluke, but damn, really, the sleeping is potentially messed up??
See what a lighthearted hahaha mood I am in today? I'm not even including any gratuitous fun pics in this post, although if you are still reading this, that probably doesn't surprise you at this point! How's that for a heavy entry? If it wasn't enough for you, I recommend finding the darkest room possible, turning on some Morrissey and climbing under the covers. That should do the trick. Matter of fact, I might go do that, except I do not care for the music of Morrissey (but maybe that's the point?). Don't despair, normal Shelly will be back soon. Just try not to mention the word "regression" to her....
2 comments:
Yikes, a rough week, indeed. Hang in there. You will make the right decision for you and Reese no matter what! BTW, I strongly discourage anyone listening to Morrissey. While Neal is a super-fan, I think M's an a** and so is his music. :)
We will definitely miss you at ACL this year though.
Sending you big hugs! xoxo
Sounds like a frustrating week for you and Reese!
I don't know what to say about preschool. I just remember that it was hard for the first month--- basically RJ made me feel guilty for dropping him off. But- I clearly remember October being very, very different. He started talking about each child and was really enjoying his teachers. Maybe Reese is still in the adjustment phase-- trying to learn about each child, deciding who she likes to play with, etc. I would try another week or two just to see if she can get more comfortable. Or maybe try one day a week her first year.
Have a wonderful and relaxing time in Florida!
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