Saturday, December 19, 2009

Heart hugs

To say the past two weeks have been an emotional roller coaster would be putting things lightly. Weston is such a blessing, such a wonderful and sweet baby, the best gift we could receive during the holidays. His birth and first 11 days have been amazing--he has won the hearts of everyone completely and totally. He even got to visit Granny two times this week--she smiled and tried to hold him and pat him when she saw him, which meant so much to me.

Losing my grandmother has been sad and hard. The past few days have been trying and difficult in many ways. But there are also so many bright spots as a result. Our large family gathered in Austin over the past two days for the viewing Friday night and the memorial service today. Many of my cousins attended, and all of my aunts and uncles came. So everyone has had a chance to meet Weston at a really young age and to see/meet Reese. It's been wonderful catching up with everyone. It was really amazing to have such a great turnout at the memorial today--so many family members travelled from near and far to be there. Some friends and neighbors also showed up, which was lovely. The service was emotional, sad and touching. My cousins sang and led prayers, my uncle ran the service and many of my aunts and cousins got up and shared memories. I had the enormous honor of delivering the eulogy. While it was a little nerve-wracking to have such a large responsibility, it was also very humbling to have the chance to speak about Granny, whom I loved so dearly and who meant so much to me. I am so thankful that I was able to participate in the service in such a way.

Not to get all introspective and cliche, but naturally the cycle of life came to mind several times. Most clearly when Granny and Weston interacted, but in smaller ways as well. I'm very aware that I am enormously lucky to have had 3 living grandparents at the age of 34--that is quite rare. And for my children to know or have met three great-grandparents.

I have spent a lot of time just staring at our sweet new baby. He amazes me, the same way Reese amazed me--but you tend to get caught up in things and life gets loud and fast and you forget about these sweet quiet moments.
We are also very lucky that we have a remarkably relaxed and laid back little fellow. This is mainly what he does (as seen through my poor quality iphone images):
Resting on Daddy


Taking a midday rest


From a different angle


Taken about 5 minutes ago


So, you see, it's pretty easy to sit and stare at him. At least at this point in the game. He doesn't do much but sleep or eat (to Reese's great disappointment), but he excels at those two things. (Last week he weighed 5lbs 9oz when we were discharged from the hospital; exactly one week later, he weighed 6lbs, 10oz!) (warning: this blog might soon digress into the realm of regurgitating all the measurement stats from the many upcoming pediatrician visits)
Getting back to the point (maybe?): David and I faced the very confusing task of explaining the death of a loved one to a 3 1/2 year old. We debated what to do and ultimately decided to just tell her in a very simple and matter of fact way and let her guide the conversation. I think it was a good tactic, and she asked a lot of very astute questions. She also completely caught us off guard when she told us, "Granny's in my heart. She's giving my heart a hug." What a wonderful way to express the way you feel about someone who isn't with you for whatever reason. It was one of those comments that I'll never forget--a "wow" moment when she made that observation. And of course, the perfect way to end a eulogy...and a rambling blog entry....

2 comments:

emmylou + miller said...

What a wonderful post, Shelly. Please know we are thinking of you all and sending our love at this sad time.

Reese's comment was too sweet and I am just swooning over Weston's sleeping pics. Your kids are so precious!

Please let me know if there's anything you guys need.

xoxo,
Becca

Sarah said...

Oh, Shelly. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family after your grandmother's passing.

And I adore the sleeping pics of Weston. What a little angel.

Lots and lots of love to you all.
xoxo